Tracking my weight loss

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Monday, 5 March 2012

Falling off the track

I had a moment on the weekend.  After eating out, enjoying frozen yoghurt, chocolate and alcohol on Saturday night, I jumped on the scale Sunday and bam I was up 2 kilos. Just like that!

Needless to say I was devo. I had been doing so well that I had lost my motivation and just wanting to enjoy myself meant giving in to all temptations around me. That day I ate well and gave myself a serious talk and some serious self loathing came into it.

It is always like this. I slip, I lose motivation, I get too comfortable and bam! I gain weight and hate myself again.

The thing is, it's not my body that I hate. I actually get along quite well with my body. We have gotten used to each other. (In fact I am even a bit scared of what losing weight will do to my body because it will mean more change and unfamiliar territory because I have never been skinny.)

The part I don't like is peoples judgement and looks I get when I go out with my super hot and skinny friends, or try to find clothes that actually cover up my thighs rather than sitting underneath my bum just waiting to flash everyone.

I don't like it when I think everyone must think I eat junk food, sit on the couch and watch telly all day. When thats not true at all.

But worse than that, is that I know I can be much more than I am. I can do better, I can be better. But I just have to find the will power and strength to do it.

So for the next two weeks I am going to go hard- harder than I have been doing. To make up for the weekend and hopefully reach my next goal of 2 kgs. If I can do that I can enjoy my friends birthday and have one or two drinks. (and actually feel good dressing up)

To help me stick to it  I have brought in my little piggy bank in, and every time I slip  ( that piece of chocolate for example) I have to put a gold coin in. Depending on how much I have in there the money will go towards getting some equipment at home, for example a skipping rope.

I am also getting up and half an hour early to do some lunges and squats and make my food for the day.

Hopefully at the end of the two weeks I will feel better about myself, feel motivated and on track and maybe even have reached my goal of being under 100 kgs.

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