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Sunday, 19 May 2013

Breaking the Hate Circle

Catching up on posts from some of my favourite bloggers I came across Diane's post here>

Sorry for some reason I can't hyperlink.

Anyways the blog is about judgemental blogging within the weight loss community.

I have been very lucky that I have never come across any of the bloggers/blogs that attack struggling weight loss bloggers but it doesn't surprise me to hear that they exist. If they exist in real life then why shouldn't they exist in cyberspace?

One particular comment really got to me:

"Haters are going to hate. I know I cannot fix or change them just like I cannot fix or change a person who does not want to stop binge eating or loose weight.
Draw a circle around the haters. Don’t go in there. We have that choice. We also have delete buttons, ways to block people. Underused in the hater world. There’s hate within every community out there.
Bravo for not linking to the sites. It’s what they thrive on. Any site that is commercial will get money for the clicks. Since I like the right to free speech, and I have limited time and the freedom to choose, I read what takes me further. It’s nice to have that power.
Don’t step inside that circle you’ve drawn around the hater. I won’t change the hater, but I can change me."- Karen.P.

Another commenter said "Most people struggling with weight issues are mean enough to themselves without outside meanness"

I love the first comment about drawing a circle around the hater. Protect yourself and don't let them affect your life and your struggle because life is hard enough without someone hating on you.

The second comment I think really nails it, we are own worst critic. More than any hate blogger we criticise our efforts daily- hourly even.

I am sure there are many people who if they read my blog might not have seen much progress in my weight loss journey and would like to think I'm not trying hard enough. Yet, if they were to have met me a year ago and were to meet me today they would be able to see the difference. Daily I am grateful that I made the choice to take my weight and life in order. I am fitter and getting fitter all the time. I can do squats, sit ups, crunches, lunges, dips, push ups, reverse push ups, burpees and all the different versions of them. Slowly I am getting better and doing more of them. I can run around the block without stopping. I can walk up stairs without panting. Small things which make such a difference in how we live our lives.

My confidence has increased immensely. I am happy with myself and my body again. My measurements have decreased and every time I put on something I haven't worn in a while I have room where I didn't before.

Am I depressed that I am not losing faster? That I haven't got down to my "ideal" weight? To be perfectly honest- no. I have lost weight fast before and each time I have put it back on. This time I don't want to put it back on, which means I have to do something different. I have to figure out all the mental and emotional issues that goes along with weight gain and loss, and that takes time.

So long as I continually strive to improve myself and my body I am happy with the smaller changes. I have lost weight, I have dropped dress sizes and I am actually not that far off from where I want to be.

I am not in a hurry.

I want to do this once and do it right.

Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Building blocks

Last week was a big week for me. Thursday night I sat down with mum and a man from Homebuyers Centre here in WA and by Friday afternoon I was building a house and had secured a block of land!

It's only a small block with 3x2 on it with a small courtyard out the back and double garage but for a young single person it's all I need right now.

I told my friends on Saturday night and they were equal parts excited and 'you crazy'. To them owning a home is too much of a commitment or simply costs too much. They look at me in surprise when I say that I managed to get my deposit together myself, it was just that the bank wanted me to pay my HECS (university fees) off first which I needed mum's help with.

I understand that they have higher living costs than I do. I live at home and contribute to bills and cooking and the food and all that but I don't pay rent.

On the other hand most of my friends are earning more than me or have been working for longer than me. I have only been full time for a year and a half. I'm 24 in September.

What it comes down to is motivation, focus and perseverance. I was lucky, I got used to living on a budget when I was at uni and haven't got out of the habit yet. Which means at the end of the first few months of working full time I realised I needed to set myself a goal or I wouldn't know what to do with my money. (Sounds silly doesn't it?) So I decided to get into the property market. Here in WA houses are EXPENSIVE and really hard to get into. There are just so many people wanting to buy at the moment (there were 12 other people who wanted my block of land!!). So I wanted to get in while I could and hopefully in a few years I'll be able to sell and move into something bigger... that's the plan anyways!

Now I want to use that same determination to losing the weight and making changes permanently. At the moment I have been trialing a few things but haven't found anything that I have really stuck to and got results. There are other things I want to do as well, for a more well rounded life balance.

So here are a few goals I have set for the next 6 months or so:

Save really hard. Yup I'll need all the spare cash I can get for things that pop up and for those initial moving in costs.

Stop drinking. I'm not usually a drinker, but lately I have had so many bdays and the like that I have found that I'm drinking almost every weekend. And I don't like it. So besides for my friends bday in June, I don't want to drink for the next 6 months. At least.

Cut back on the take away coffee. I usually will have a nice cup of coffee 2-4 times a week. That can mean $20 on a coffee a week! Sure I don't do this all the time but I need to get out of the habit of being tired and going and spending $5 on a nice cuppa in the morning. I want to get it down to 1-2 times a week initially and then down to twice a fortnight, or once a week.

Bring/ make my lunch at least 5 times a week.  I have been training more lately which means in the evening I come home exhausted. All I want to do is shower and go to bed. I need to get in the habit of getting myself organised in the evenings as in the morning I just get up and go, go, go.

Get back into my craft zone. I used to do a lot of art and craft things when I was at uni and younger. Lately I feel that I need to get back in touch with these roots. Maybe I can even do a few artsy pieces for my new place?

I want to increase my incidental exercise. But it's also going into winter here and I hate the dark and being wet. So not sure yet how I am going to combat that.. will look into it further and report back!

Sunday, 5 May 2013

Jumping straight back into it..

So I have been off for about a week visiting the family in rural NSW. I tell ya, we always put on extra kgs when we visit because all you do is eat, eat and eat.

Which is fine, I ate more but I also said no quite a lot too.

I also jumped straight back into training again on Friday night with boxing. I was a little worried because it had been over a week since I had had a solid training session, but I did fine. Really good actually. I have started to make it more and more around the park without stopping (Booyah!) and in the two minute rounds I can now do most exercises for two minutes without stopping.

So I felt good, I got straight back into it and now feel more settled knowing my routine is back to normal.

For me having a routine is very important, otherwise there is just too much to decide and change. Changes for me can often lead to bad choices.

I understand that not everyone sees a routine the way I do, but I was a bit surprised by the number of people who asked me when I got back from training if I was going to have a bit of  a break before I started up again. (As in start on Monday, rather than Friday, or even later.)

For me it doesn't make sense to delay the inevitable, I have to go back at some point so I might as well jump straight back into it rather than putting it off.

Besides the sooner I get into it the sooner I can work off any excess that might have crept on while I was away.

The sooner I get back into it, the sooner I get out of 'holiday' mode. (And the better my body will be! )

I keep saying this lately, but I am really noticing big changes in my body and appearance.

I think this has something to do with the fact that I have also made the decision to stop buying so many clothes and actually wear the ones out in my wardrobe first... which means I am wearing clothes that have been in my cupboard for years but only pull out occasionally. ( So occasionally that it might be the first time I have worn it in 1-2 years.!!)

So the difference of how it fits is amazing. For example, I have an over sized blouse that I wear with a belt at the waist which I normally pair with a black skirt and leggings. This over sized blouse now is almost too over sized.

Other things that I have noticed is that pants and skirts are starting to get too big around the waist. Dresses are fitting  me better, particularly around the bust and waist, but also around my hips and stomach.

I am actually wearing JEANS more often! Which if you have read any of my previous posts you would know what a big deal that is..

I have lost weight in my face, you can see my cheek bones more and weirdly my fingers as well... my ring now feels a bit loose!

All in all I feel amazing. The more I notice the better I want to look after myself, I want to take care of this body that I am slowly falling back in love with. I want to make sure I look my best and feel my best always.

This means that I have started making more time for doing my nails, my hair, my makeup. Making more time to pack healthy lunches and snacks. Making more time to look after my skin. Making more time to do more exercise outside of training, liking taking the dogs for walks. (OK, this might have more to do with the fact that there is a very good looking jogger on the paths at this time.. but it counts right? )

But this means I feel more confident and happy with myself. I feel strong and beautiful and I think others are starting to notice that more and more. I see it in how my friends act around me. I see it in the male attention that I have started to receive.

It is both amazing and saddening. Sad because now I realise how far gone I was before, and amazing because I feel like I've finally started to live life again!