Ok, so being a young single female, meeting and attracting the opposite sex is high on the list. Only because I would like to settle down before I'm 30, and well that's only 6 years to find someone, get to know each other, get engaged, get married etc
I'm kidding of course. While I would love to meet that special someone, I am in no rush to settle down. Being single for the last 3 years has taught me a lot about myself, about what I want in life and also has given me the strength to get my arse into shape. Literally.
So for the most part I do not go out on a limb to meet any guys, whether it's going out or hooking up at parties, it usually ends at a conversation and a nice to meet you at the end of the night.
I must admit though, at times this has annoyed me. Mostly because I felt that I didn't have a choice in the matter. This was because I'd gotten so used to being the 'fat' one in the group, the ugly duckling so to speak and that I always just assumed to guys talk to me to be nice and get me to introduce them to my friends. This has happened a lot, so it's not like I come up with this stuff on my own.
But the thing is, it's not necessarily true any longer.
I realised this when I went out on the weekend for a hen's night. I was out with the girls at a club- I haven't gone clubbing in over a year- and I actually received attention, for myself. Which it took a while to sink in, but when a guy a) remembers your name and b) add me on facebook (facebook is the new mobile number ;) ) that makes it kind of obvious.
It came as a shock of course because I still see myself as the girl I was, not who I am now. Even though I am receiving more compliments, improving my fitness and generally finding clothes are getting bigger, it is still really hard to think of myself as being physically smaller.
Obviously it is a mental thing. Now I understand why some girls who have lost massive amounts of weight think of themselves as big and need to lose more, or still aren't confident in themselves, because quite simply inside their brain, they are the same girl before she lost the weight.
This is something which I think I need to work on, but I'm not really sure how to do it. How so I convince myself I am smaller than what I was? And should I really bother? Will it just sink in one day when I can fit in normal clothes and don't have fat around my tummy? Or is it something that I need to be conscious of now??
All I know is that it's quite nice to receive some male attention from time to time, but I am not ready to jump into a relationship any time soon. I still have so much I need to discover about myself.
P.S I wore jeans to work! By choice the other day!!! That is something that would never have happened before I started losing weight!! WOOP WOOP!